The Boy is Mine
by CodeForConfession
Summary: Emmett and Rosalie are throwing their four year old daughter a birthday party. An uninvited guest stirs up trouble in their happy little world. AH/AU Rated M for language and adult *One-Shot entry for Ninapolitan's DILF contest* Co-written with Hannah81.


**Ninapolitan's ****D.I.L.F. Contest**

**Story Title - **The Boy Is Mine

**Authors - **Hannah81 and CullenBabe86

**Pairing - **Emmett and Rosalie

**Vamp or Human - **Human

**Disclaimer: **Stephanie Meyer owns all Twilight characters. We just own the plot.

**All copyright and trademarked items mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. The remaining content is all the original author's. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.**

_~ Emmett ~_

"Daddy, Daddy, can I have my presents now?" Jocelyn called loudly from the kitchen.

"Not yet, honey, wait 'til everyone arrives!" I called back, poking my head around the corner from the den where I was blowing up millions of balloons.

She appeared in the doorway with her tiny hands on her hips, a favorite pose of her mother's, and pouted at me. She was adorable; she was wearing the pink dress that Rose and I had bought her for her birthday with some sparkly fairy wings that Rose's parents had given her, her long, golden hair fell in ringlets down her back and her big blue eyes beamed at me with excitement. I couldn't believe that my little girl was already four years old.

"But I WANT them!" she screamed, stamping her little foot.

I held in a chuckle, she had no idea how adorable she was when she was angry; another trait she shared with her mother.

"Come on, Munchkin, why don't you help me blow up some balloons while we wait?" I said as I held my arms out for her to jump onto my lap.

"NO!" she yelled loudly, scrunching her hands into small fists.

Rosalie appeared behind her and gave me a small smile.

"Someone's tired," she said as she ran her fingers softly though our daughter's hair.

I smiled back at her. There was no word to describe my Rosie other than _perfection._ Not only was she a wet-dream in the looks department but she was an awesome mother and the most loving woman I had ever known, I just adored her. My eyes travelled up her body, over her curves and settled on her gorgeous face. She winked at me, probably remembering how I had worshiped her body last night and I couldn't help the shit-eating grin that broke out over my face at the memory.

"I'm NOT tired!" Jocelyn yelled, turning to scowl at her mother.

I stood from the sofa, balloons falling from my lap and floating around the room. I quietly crept up behind my girls as Jocelyn continued to whine about her presents. When I was right behind her I grabbed a balloon off the floor and popped it behind her, setting off a loud bang. Jocelyn shrieked and jumped around to stare at me wide-eyed.

When she saw me kneeling in front of her smiling, she burst out laughing and wrapped her tiny arms around my neck.

"You're silly, Daddy!" she giggled as I scooped her up and carried her over to the couch, plopping her down in the middle of a pile of balloons and she laughed again as they floated around her.

"Everyone will be here in about an hour," Rosie said as she turned to walk back into the kitchen.

"We'll be ready," I assured her and gave a wink to my daughter who was swatting at the balloons on the couch.

Jocelyn and I blew up the rest of the balloons and tied ribbons to them.

"Why don't you go help your mom with the food while I hang these?" I suggested and I watched as Jocelyn skipped into the kitchen singing, "Happy Birthday to me!"

I gathered up all the balloons and carried them through the house. As I walked through the kitchen, I smiled at Jocelyn who was arranging carrot sticks in the salad bowl and leaned over the bench to kiss Rosie on the forehead.

I continued out into the yard and climbed the ladder to string up the balloons around the patio and pool house. It was almost noon and the sun was high in the sky, shining down brightly and making me squint my eyes. I pulled my shirt over my head and let it drop to the floor as I wiped the sweat from my forehead with the back of my hand. I could feel the sweat beading on my chest and I smiled, thinking that it was the perfect day for Jocelyn's birthday barbecue.

Once all the balloons were hung, I started getting the grill ready. The sound of gravel crunching brought my attention to the driveway and I saw two blurry shapes come sprinting through the yard and heard two loud splashes. I smiled; the Cullens were here.

"Hey boys," I called cheerily when they had both surfaced in the pool. Jacob and Sam were very energetic for teenagers. Sam was fourteen and Jacob was thirteen, both just learning that girls don't have cooties.

"Hi, Mr. McCarty," they called back at the same time.

"Sorry about that Emmett," a deep voice said from behind me, and I turned to see Carlisle and Esme coming through the side gate. They were very loving parents. They treated everyone's kids like they were their own. I nodded my head to let them know it wasn't a problem.

Esme was carrying a platter of food and Carlisle had a large present wrapped in pink paper, tucked under his arm. I saw Esme blush slightly and remembered that I was only wearing my cargo shorts and flip-flops. She disappeared inside the house and I heard her greet Rosalie and Jocelyn.

"Hey, Dad, come jump in the pool!" Jacob called out loudly.

"I'll come in later," Carlisle called back as he placed the presents on the table.

The gate swung open again and in waddled a very pregnant Alice, carrying a medium sized package, followed by Jasper, one hand on her lower back.

"Jazz," I said happily, high-fiving him as he walked past.

"I need to sit down!" Alice said, out of breath as she plonked into one of the lawn chairs. "Jazzy, can you bring me some iced-tea?" she asked, smiling sweetly.

"Sure thing, babe," he replied as he walked into the house, taking the present with him.

"UNCLE CARLISLE!" Jocelyn yelled happily as she ran out into the patio and flung herself into Carlisle's arms. Esme was Rosalie's mother's sister, making them our blood relatives.

"Hello, Princess," he smiled.

"I'm a _fairy_ princess today," she corrected him and turned so he could see the fairy wings she was wearing.

"So you are," Carlisle laughed. "You look beautiful."

"Can I open my presents now, Daddy?" she asked, turning to look at me with pleading eyes.

"What did Mommy say?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Humph! That I have to wait 'til everyone is here," she huffed, folding her arms over her chest.

"How about you open this little one I have hidden in my pocket?" Carlisle asked as he pulled a small pink box out of his pocket.

Jocelyn's face lit up and she turned to me with big, wide eyes.

"Can I, Daddy? PLEASE?" she begged, her ringlets bouncing as she quivered with excitement.

"OK, just don't tell Mommy," I whispered with a laugh.

She pulled the lid off the box and pulled out a string of pink plastic beads and cheered loudly.

"I love it, Uncle," she said as she put the necklace over her head and ran back into the house.

There was another loud splash and I glanced over to see that Anthony had just dive-bombed into the pool.

"Anthony Charles Masen!" I heard Bella call loudly and turned to see her standing by the pool covered in water.

"Sorry, Mom!" Anthony said sheepishly before joining in the game of Marco Polo with the Cullen boys.

"Heya, Bellarina," I called across the yard as she sat in the char next to Alice, commenting on her ever-growing belly.

She waved back to me just as an annoyed Edward came through the gate, carrying a small, frilly pink gift, followed by a blond woman who I had never seen before. I gave Edward a curious look and he just pointed at Bella and shrugged his shoulders, ducking inside to drop the present off before coming to stand with Carlisle and I by the grill.

Jasper returned and took Alice her drink, followed by Esme and Jocelyn who were giggling about a joke that Jocelyn had just told her, and Rosalie, carrying a tray of raw meat for me to put on the grill.

Rosie stopped short when she saw the blond woman and gave me a questioning look. I shrugged my shoulders and turned to Edward.

"Who's the blond?" I asked.

"Bella's friend Lauren," he said with a slight shudder. "I apologize in advance!"

I laughed thinking he was joking, but his straight face made me think that he was serious. I looked around at the three boys in the pool, and everyone else chatting happily around the backyard and knew that today was going to be fun.

_Let's get this party started!_ I thought as I started up the grill.

_~Rosalie~_

I stood back from the grill a few feet, holding the tray of various meats, and admired my gorgeous husband from the back. He was every woman's dream: muscular, sweet, brave, romantic, sarcastic, cuddly…

We had been married for the past six years and I had loved every minute of it. Our courtship was short. I knew we were destined to be together. He was my other half. My soul mate. So when he proposed to me after five months of dating, I immediately said, "Yes."

Our wedding was simple, yet romantic. We said our vows during the sunset on the sand of Laguna Beach, California. It was my favorite memory of us. He looked sexy in his white dress pants and light blue, button-down shirt, the ocean as his backdrop. If the wedding was good, the honeymoon was fabulous.

Our first night as husband and wife was the best that I had ever had, especially after a week of abstinence. Who knew that underneath all that muscle was really a passionate, attentive lover? We made love all night, even roughing it up a few times, and it still turned me on just thinking about it.

I glanced over again at the blonde girl, wondering who she was. I knew I had only invited the six of them plus the kids, so who had invited her? I watched as she glanced over at my husband, her eyes slowly running down his muscular frame. My eyes narrowed as she licked her lips, unconsciously probably, before she quickly glanced over at me. I glared at her as I walked closer to my husband, holding the tray out in front of me. She looked slightly guilty at being caught ogling my man, but I ignored that as I sauntered closer.

I walked towards Emmett, stepping around him to set the tray down next to the grill. Looking down at the hot dogs, an idea popping into my head. Grabbing one, I turned around to face him, watching his eyes dart down to the hot dog and back up at me. I smirked, knowing this would give him a hard on.

I saw the rest of the guys standing around, looking at me with wide eyes. I internally rolled my eyes. _Men..._ Glancing around to check the kids were occupied, I locked eyes with Emmett and brought the hot dog up to my lips, my tongue peaking out to touch it. I heard the guys draw in deep breaths, taking in the sight. Trying hard not to smirk even further, I stuck the tip in my mouth, sucking on it lightly. I heard my husband groan and move closer to grip my hips.

"Babe, what are you doing?" he too glanced around to see if the kids were occupied before looking back at me, lust shining in his eyes. I swirled my tongue around the end before biting some off. I glanced down as I did, noticing his already massive erection, and chewed the piece slowly before swallowing and looking back up.

Gazing into his eyes, I said innocently, "I was hungry." Taking another bite of the hot dog, I turned around, smirking to myself at the awed stares of the rest of the men, and headed towards my daughter. _That should keep her away from my husband._

I remembered the day Jocelyn was born. It was the proudest moment in my life. I was a mother. She was so precious and small. I loved watching Emmett interact with her the most. He would hold her close, whispering sweetly to her and letting her tiny hand squeeze his big pinky. I felt so lucky to get to witness their interactions.

As she grew up, anytime she got hurt in any way, he was there holding her close and rubbing her back soothingly. He really was the best father to our daughter. It made me fall even more in love with him. When she was a toddler, I once woke up to her cries in the middle of the night, only to get there and find him slowly rocking her back and forth, singing her a lullaby. Recalling the memory brought a smile to my face.

I was brought out of my thoughts by something solid slamming into my legs. I looked down at the round, beautiful face of my daughter smiling up at me. Her blond ringlets swayed with the wind and her bright blue eyes shined with excitement. "Mommy! Mommy! Look what Anthony did!" She held up her little arm covered with pen tattoos of Anthony's name. I'm sure my face looked pale because her smile faded slightly.

"Oh, honey…" I trailed off, sighing deeply. I tried not to panic. It was only ink and would wash off, but I couldn't believe she let someone draw on her. Grabbing Jocelyn's hand, I began to pull her towards the house. I heard Bella laugh and glanced over at the same time she looked over at us crossing the yard. She gasped at seeing what was written on Jocelyn's arm.

"Anthony!" she yelled. I could hear him running over to her as I entered the back door, dragging Jocelyn through and making our way to the sink. "How could you do that to her? On her birthday!" her shouts filtered through the still open door.

Laughing, I grabbed some paper towel, wetting it and putting soap on it before beginning to scrub the stubborn ink from her skin. I smiled at Jocelyn as I washed her arm, letting her know I wasn't angry with her. She smiled back at me and glanced towards the back door where laughter was now ringing through as I continued to work.

It was a few minutes before I got most of the ink off. Once I was satisfied it wouldn't show up in any pictures, I released her to go back outside and cleaned up the water mess on the counter.

Tossing the rest of the paper towels in the trash, I made my way outside and joined Alice, Bella, and Blondie on the patio chairs.

I noticed Blondie's eyes narrow at my approach. Who did she think she was? She came to _my_ home, attended _my_ daughter's birthday party, and had the nerve to even _look_ at _my_ husband that way? I didn't think so.

I took a seat next to Alice since Bella was sharing with Blondie, avoiding Alice's large stomach, and crossed my legs, resting my elbows on my knees. "So how is it going, ladies?"

_~ Emmett ~_

I put the meat on the grill and watched the boys playing in the pool. Jacob and Sam were playing Marco Polo and splashing around like crazy; I laughed when Esme stomped over to the edge of the water and scolded them for making too much noise. Anthony walked past me, followed by Jocelyn running after him. I had a feeling that Anthony and I were going to have a long conversation in about 10 years about dating my daughter. Rosie walked up and had a glint in her eye that I usually only saw when she was in the mood for some Emmett-lovin' and I cocked my head to the side, questioning her.

She smiled sweetly and picked up one of the cooked hot dogs from the tray and licked it slowly. I froze, my cock stiffening in my pants as I imagined that tongue running over my own trouser-hot-dog. I shifted uncomfortably, wondering why she was trying to turn me on in front of our friends and their children.

"Babe, what are you doing?" I asked cautiously before looking over my shoulder to make sure the kids weren't staring at her. I turned my attention back to her just as she slipped the end in her mouth and sucked slightly, causing me to moan involuntarily.

"I was hungry," she replied innocently as she shrugged her shoulders and gave me a sweet smile.

My mouth dropped open as I watched her walk over to the girls with a little extra swing in her hips. She sat down on a lawn chair with her back to me and joined the chit-chat that the other women were engaged in, as if nothing had happened over here–the bulge in my pants the only evidence of her actions. I turned back to the grill when the smell of burning meat caught my attention and noticed Edward standing awkwardly. A glance to his pants showed he was also tenting a bulge and I gave him a death stare.

"What the fuck, man? Does my wife get you hot?" I demanded as he blushed bright red.

Edward cleared his throat and gave me an apologetic look. I shrugged my shoulders, after all, I couldn't blame him for finding Rosie sexy–she _was_ irresistible.

"So," I said, changing the subject to let Edward off the hook, "what's the deal with the blond chick? Why did Bella invite her here?" I asked him.

"She's just been dumped and Bella didn't want to leave her alone. Sorry, man, I know this is a family thing. But it was either this or Bella wasn't going to come," he replied.

"Doesn't matter to me, Rose might be a little annoyed, but I'm sure it'll be fine," I assured him as I turned the last of the sausages and moved them onto the aluminum trays.

"Meat's ready," I called loudly to the group of people scattered in my yard.

The kids came running up to the table and tiny hands started grabbing at the sausages still in my hands, so I pulled the tray closer to my chest and out of reach.

"Take a seat," I said loudly and the four children all sat down on the benches quickly, waiting for the food.

"The food smells great," an unfamiliar female voice whispered seductively behind me and I felt all the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

I turned to see Lauren standing very close to me and I automatically took a step back.

"Ahhh, thanks...grab a plate and dig in," I stuttered uncomfortably.

I did _not_ like the look in her eyes when she stared at me. It was a hungry look, a lustful look, a look that had the potential to get me into a lot of trouble.

I quickly made my way around to the other side of the table where Jocelyn was seated.

"Daddy, help me get the food," she asked as she held her plastic party plate up in the air.

I took the plate from her and put a hot dog in a bun and squirted some ketchup onto it. Glancing up I saw that Lauren was still staring at me and I quickly looked at Rosie who was glaring at her across the table.

"Do you want salad, munchkin?" I asked, trying to distract myself from the women around me.

"No!" she yelled back loudly.

"You don't get a hot dog if you don't have salad," Rosalie said sternly as she walked around to Jocelyn and me and wrapped her arms protectively around my waist. I leaned back into her embrace, twisting my head to plant a kiss on her cheek, letting her know that I wasn't interested in Lauren.

I heard raised voices from the other end of the table and smiled that Carlisle was having the same "salad conversation" with his kids as Rosalie had just had with Jocelyn.

Fifteen minutes later, we were all seated, eating hot dogs, salad and corn on the cob. Rosie was sitting so close to me that she was practically in my lap and Edward, Carlisle and Jasper kept shooting me confused looks across the table. After we had eaten, Jocelyn announced loudly that it was time for cake.

Rosie stood and went to collect the cake from the kitchen and I decided to go help her out. I walked into the house where I saw Rosie bracing her arms on the bench with her eyes closed.

"What's wrong, babe?" I asked as I slipped my arms tightly around her.

"That... that... that bitch won't take her eyes off you!" she swore through her teeth.

"Rosie," I said softly as I leaned my face down to kiss below her ear softly. "I have absolutely no interest in her."

I felt her body relax in my arms and pressed her body firmly into the bench and smiled as my body pressed tightly against hers. I moved my hands up to the back of her head and pulled her lips to mine hungrily. There was nothing in the world I enjoyed more than kissing my wife. It was more than a physical sensation; her soul surrounded me and it was the only time I felt truly at peace.

"Babe, we have to stop," she breathed when I moved my kissed down her throat.

"Don't wanna," I mumbled into her neck as I continued to pepper small kisses on her soft skin.

Rosalie giggled softly and pressed on my chest firmly, pushing me away. I stuck out my bottom lip and gave her my puppy-dog eyes. She looked hesitant for a moment before her snarky smile returned.

"Tonight," she whispered as she moved over to the fridge and pulled Jocelyn's cake out and placed it on the bench.

"I'll hold you to that," I replied with a wink as I walked out of the kitchen and back into the yard.

As I passed through the door onto the patio, I bumped into someone and jerked forward to catch her, my arms sliding around her waist before she fell onto the pavement.

"I'm sorry, are you OK?" I asked.

Lauren looked back up at me and batted her eyelashes. "I'm fine," she whispered as she gripped my arms tightly.

I pulled her up and let go but she retained her grip on my bicep.

"Uh... where's the bathroom?" she asked as her fingers made soft circles on my bare arm.

"Through this door and just turn to your left, there's one through the laundry room," I instructed and removed her hand from my arm.

"Thanks," she giggled and blew an air kiss at me as she walked into the house.

I looked back at the kitchen nervously, but was relieved to see that Rosie was occupied putting candles on the cake and didn't notice the encounter I had just had.

_~ Rosalie ~_

I placed four, bright-pink candles onto the beautiful, fairy-themed sheet cake. I had to have it custom made, with white icing and pink trimming; it had Jocelyn's cute little face plastered over half of it, and flowers with ribbons on the other half. Nothing was too much for my little girl.

After lighting the candles, I glanced up, feeling someone's eyes on me. Catching Emmett's gaze, I noticed his slightly panicked expression a split-second before it relaxed into a lust-filled expression, his eyes scanning up and down my body.

My mind flashed to last night, when he had that same look as he hovered over me, placing gentle kisses all over my face and pressing our pelvises together in a slow, sweet way.

I watched as he walked towards the back door, smirking at me over his shoulder, like he knew what I was thinking. Rolling my eyes, I turned back to the cake, smiling at the happy face of my daughter.

My eyes watered, thinking about her growing up. She was turning into a beautiful person and I couldn't wait to see her grow up, go to college, get married, have kids of her own…

My life was perfect and I couldn't be happier.

Grabbing the cake and camera, I walked outside to the table everyone was gathered around. I spotted Jocelyn's fair hair in the crowd and made my way directly to her, placing the cake in front of her.

A chorus of "oohs" and "aahs" echoed in the backyard as everyone caught a glimpse of the beautiful cake. I snorted as the three young boys wrinkled their noses at all the pink, but beamed with pride as Jocelyn's joyous reaction.

Squealing and clapping her hands, she whispered, "Oh, Mommy! It's so pretty!" She looked up at me, smiling.

I glanced over at Bella, who was talking to Blondie. They finished their conversation and Bella met my eyes, grinning.

Blondie glanced over at Emmett again, her eyes roaming his figure, pausing on his crotch.

My eyes narrowed at her as Emmett cleared his throat, gaining my attention, though my gaze remained on the bitch. I was beyond pissed. Who did this woman think she _was_? I could not believe that she had the balls to eye-fuck my husband _in front_ of me, and at _our_ daughter's birthday party no less.

"Happy Birthday to, you!" Emmett's loud voice rang out suddenly. I looked over at him in time to see him kneel down next to Jocelyn's seat, so he was level with her. My anger melted away, as did my heart. He was so sweet to her.

I took a few pictures of them next to each other and of the rest of the party as everyone joined in on the singing.

"Happy Birthday to, you! Happy Birthday, dear Jocelyn! Happy Birthday to, you!" Everyone finished at different times, but Jocelyn didn't seem to notice.

Her eyes were squeezed shut, thinking hard about her wish, before snapping open and blowing out her candles, just as my flash went off.

Cheering and clapping ensued as she beamed around at everyone we considered our family.

Sam, Jacob, and Anthony were yelling and stamping their feet, trying to make as much noise as possible, but quieted at the glares from Bella and Esme.

I cut the marble cake into decent-sized pieces before dishing them out to everyone on pink princess fairy plates. The boys ended up having a cake fight, throwing bits of it or shoving it at each other. I had to put my foot down when they flung a particularly large piece, hitting Jocelyn square in the face.

I tried not to giggle at the sour look on her face as I cleaned the mess off, wiping off the parts stuck in her hair, too, but it was difficult.

It was soon time to open up presents. Placing them in front of her, I picked up the camera, wanting to take a picture of each gift she received.

Emmett began handing her one at a time, starting with Alice and Jasper's. She took it excitedly, shaking it slightly, trying to guess what was inside before opening it. I shook my head at her antics; she was so much like Emmett's at Christmas time.

She pondered for a few seconds before trying to tear the wrapping off, her cute little tongue sticking out. Emmett must have decided that she was taking too long because he began to help, slowly peeling away the tape for her. I took a picture of the adorable moment.

Once the wrapping paper was ripped off the rest of the way, she squealed in delight at the box. A butterfly garden. Jocelyn absolutely loved butterflies, but could she really take care of larvae? I wasn't sure and looked over to Alice skeptically. She shrugged and smiled, not knowing what to say since Jocelyn was still squealing about the gift.

I watched as she pulled out two more wrapped items, tore off the paper and pulled out a purple, Ralph Lauren, long-sleeved polo shirt and white capri pants. My eyes bugged out at seeing those, knowing they cost a lot, and I shot a glare in Alice and Jasper's direction. He turned away from my gaze, but Alice just stared me down, the expression on her face telling me not to argue.

Our glares remained locked as Jocelyn squealed again, tugging on my shirt. "Mommy! Mommy! Look at these!" She held up a pair of white ballet flats, completing her outfit. Of course. Alice, the shopaholic, had to get a complete outfit.

_It really is a cute outifit._

I smiled at her, genuinely this time, and grabbed the outfit and butterfly garden to set aside so she could open the rest of the presents. She reached over and grabbed the pink, frilly package from the Cullens, and began to open the biggest one. I caught Esme's eye, and knew exactly what this one was. I had caught her making it a few times, before she quickly hid it when Jocelyn came through the door.

Snapping a picture of Jocelyn's shocked face, I watched as she pulled out a large pink and green patchwork quilt, designed with swirls, hearts, and flowers. I rushed over, scooping it up as it dragged on the ground, admiring the handiwork that Esme spent months on. "Ooooh!" Jocelyn whispered. "It's so pretty!" She beamed up at Esme, a large smile on her little face. "Thank you, Aunt Esme!"

"Oh, you're welcome, sweetie," Esme said, hugging Jocelyn close to her body. Sam, Jacob, and Anthony were starting to get restless, waiting for her to finish opening her presents and goof around some more, as Jocelyn squeezed Carlisle around the waist. I watched Anthony bounce around on his feet, trying to sneak sly glances with Edward. My eyes narrowed as I saw Edward wink at him, and give him a small smile.

I grabbed the quilt from her and folded it up before setting on the table, guiding her back to the rest of the presents. Once her sights were set on the last present, she tore into it with fervor, but stopped suddenly and stared at the box. Confused, I peaked over her shoulder, and immediately shot a glare at Edward. His innocent expression didn't fool me.

Emmett's happy shout made me turn to look at him, just in time to see him fist bump Edward, who had a pleased look on his face now. I watched as he pulled Anthony to his side, both grinning that identical smirk. "Edward Anthony Masen!" yelled Bella. She flushed beet red as she stared at her husband, a horrified expression on her face. "How could you buy that for her?" Then her eyes narrowed. "You bought that for you and Emmett, didn't you?" Her expression turned dangerous. "I told you and Anthony to go out and find a suitable present for a _four _year old _girl_! Not something for you and Emmett!" she screeched.

Turning my gaze to Jocelyn, I saw she was looking at Bella in confusion, holding the X-box 360 in her hands. I watched Blondie snicker, before she started to full-out laugh. Oh that woman was making me so mad today... she looked at me then, holding my stare as she laughed.

I heard another snicker, and turned to see Alice covering her mouth, her shoulders shaking with suppressed mirth. Jasper was smiling at Emmett, as was Carlisle. Esme was trying to look stern, but like Alice, was covering her mouth to hide her smile. Frustrated, I gathered the presents, glared at Emmett and stomped off to the house, laughter now ringing in my wake.

_~ Emmett ~_

Rosie gave me the stink eye as she walked into the house with her arms loaded up with Jocelyn's presents and I tried to pull my laughter into check. I couldn't help laughing though, Bella rarely got mad and I had never seen her mad at Edward, so her sudden explosion had caught me completely off guard. Rosie stomped into the house and after she was gone, laughter bubbled from my chest again.

"Can we go swimming now?" Jake asked his father.

"Please, Dad, please?" Sam begged.

"Alright. Who wants to play a game of volleyball?" Carlisle asked.

"I'm in!" Anthony yelled excitedly as he ran over to the pool and jumped in.

"Can I play, Daddy?" Jocelyn asked softly as she tugged on my shorts.

I bent down to kneel at her level so I could talk softly.

"Sorry, sweetheart, this is a game for the bigger kids, but maybe Aunty Alice would paint your toenails if you asked her nicely?" I said as I looked at Alice for conformation. She nodded her head excitedly.

Jocelyn's face lit up and she ran over to Alice.

"Can you, can you Aunty Alice? Pleeease?" she begged as she bounced up and down quickly.

"Sure thing, munchkin," Alice giggled.

Jocelyn spun around and ran into the house to collect her bottles of nail polish, and knowing that my daughter was entertained for the time being, I walked over to the pool to join the volleyball game. Jake, Sam, Anthony and Carlisle were already in the water picking teams of three people each. I saw Edward come out of the pool house carrying a net and the ball, and I helped him string the net across the middle of the pool.

"Hurry up, Dad!" Anthony proclaimed loudly, annoyed with how long it was taking to get the net set up.

"Patience is a virtue, son," Edward scolded before kicking the ball into the water for the kids to play with while they waited.

Once the net was set up and the teams were picked, Edward and I jumped into the cool water and swam over to the boys to talk about the rules of the game. I had often found that when teenage boys were involved, it was often useful to have rules or else anything could occur.

Carlisle and his two sons made one team, and Edward, his son and I were the other team. Edward, Anthony and I swam to our side of the net and waited for Sam to serve the ball.

"You do know that Lauren has been staring at you this whole time?" Edward asked as we waited for the ball.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

I glanced over to the girls sitting around and noticed that she was indeed staring at me, or leering would be more accurate. When she noticed me looking she pushed her chest out a little and licked her lips. I scrunched up my face in disgust, as if she could compare to my Rosie! Just then the ball soared across the net but I was too preoccupied to notice and it smacked me in the head.

"HAHAHA, Uncle Emmett! One point to the Cullen Team!" Sam yelled loudly as he high-fived Jake.

"You OK?" Edward asked with a smirk on his face.

"I'm fine!" I grumbled as I threw the ball back over the net.

I tried my hardest to concentrate on the game I was playing, but it was difficult when Lauren was strutting up and down the side of the pool wearing the tiniest string bikini I had ever seen. It was obscenely small and I found it quite inappropriate to be wearing in front of teenage boys, however, I couldn't tear my eyes away from her. Once I learned that she had been staring at me, I found myself looking at her regularly to try and catch her in the act.

"GOOD JOB!" Edward yelled loudly.

"Thanks, Dad!" Anthony replied with a big grin and I looked over to see Carlisle consoling his boys over the lost point.

The next time I glanced over to the women sitting around, Rosie had joined them and was helping Alice to entertain Jocelyn.

"Look at me, Daddy!" my daughter called loudly.

"TIME OUT!" I yelled and everyone in the pool stopped playing. "5 minute break!" I added to which everyone nodded.

Esme and Bella brought bottled water over to their husbands and sons, while I climbed out of the pool and walked over to my ladies.

"You look gorgeous, sweetheart," I said with a smile.

Alice and Rosie had gone all out on the makeover. Jocelyn had her finger nails and toe nails painted bright pink, as well as dozens of little braids in her hair. She grinned up at me and I couldn't help but to grin back. Whether I liked it or not, this little girl had me wrapped around her little finger.

"Come on, Uncle Emmett!" Sam called impatiently from the pool, and I turned to see everyone was back in their positions, ready to recommence playing.

"Here I come!" I yelled as I ran over to the pool, leapt into the air and pulled my knees up to my chest. I landed hard, a loud clapping sound ringing in my ears as a huge wave of water splashed everyone.

When I surfaced I wiped the water off my face with my hands and looked to see the kids all laughing as the women gave me annoyed looks. I chuckled loudly because I knew they weren't really mad.

"Can I serve?" Anthony called loudly.

"Sure thing, kiddo," I said, passing him the ball and taking my place.

Through the rest of the game, I kept my eyes on my daughter; it was her special day and I wanted to make sure she enjoyed every single moment of it. If I had seen her looking bored, I would have stopped the volleyball game and suggested something that she could join in with. But to my relief, she appeared to be enjoying herself, sitting with the ladies in the sun.

"I think that's enough now, boys," Esme called from the edge of the pool as she held up towels to her son, indicating it was time for them to get out of the water.

I looked up and noticed that the sun was almost setting; I hadn't realized that we had been playing for so long, it must have been at least two hours. Everyone got out of the pool and dried off. I left my shirt off and got to work pulling the net down. I rolled it into a tight ball, so that the strings wouldn't get tangled before we could use it again, and carried the net and ball back to the pool house.

I pulled the door open and felt around for the light switch, blinking as the fluorescent light flickered on. Walking over to the shelf, I neatly placed the net down before placing the ball on top of it. I was about to turn around when I felt soft hands slip around my waist and move up my bare chest.

"Mmmmmmm," I hummed as I pressed back into the warm body behind me. "As much as I want to continue, I think we should wait until everyone has left and Jocelyn has gone to bed."

"I think we should do this right now," the person said in a voice that was most certainly _not_ my wife's.

I spun around to see Lauren standing with a smug look on her face wearing only the tiny string bikini, her hard nipples visible under the thin material.

"What the _fuck?_" I asked shocked as I took several steps backwards until I was up against the wall.

"Don't be so shy," she purred as she stalked towards me.

"I'm not shy, I'm very married!" I shot back at her.

She gave me a wink. "I won't tell if you don't."

OK, this was dangerous! I had to get out of this before Rosie found out and removed my dick. I was very fond of it and didn't like the idea of living without it. Not to mention the blood bath that would ensue if Rosie got her hands on Lauren.

"OK, Lauren, you're very funny, but let's get out of here. Everyone is waiting," I reasoned.

"They've all gone inside actually. Edward offered to set up the X-Box and the boys wanted to play some games, so they all went inside to watch. It's just you... and me."

When she said the word "me," she placed her index finger on her chest and slowly ran it down between her breasts, tugging the material low enough for her breasts to become dangerously close to falling out.

"Ooops," she giggled as she released the material and allowed it to snap back into place.

"OK, I'm going inside," I said annoyed as I went to move passed her.

I walked quickly towards the door, but not before she grabbed my arm and spun me around, planting her lips firmly on mine. My eyes widened in shock and my body froze stiff. _What the..._ Grabbing her shoulders, I tried to gently push her away, not wanting to physically hurt her, but obviously not in time.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?" Rosie voice screamed from the doorway.

I shoved Lauren away and my eyes snapped up, seeing fury on the face of the woman I loved. I was a dead man, about to be a dickless, dead man.

_~ Rosalie ~_

After putting the cake in the fridge, I walked into the living room, seeing Edward, Carlisle and the boys setting up the X-Box while the girls were all huddled in the corner, trying to put together the butterfly garden. I frowned, noticing Emmett wasn't there. _Where could he be?_ My eyes narrowed further when I didn't spot that whore anywhere either. _She wouldn't, would she?_

I headed out to the pool house, knowing that Emmett had to put away the equipment, hoping against hope that nothing was really going on. My stomach was in knots, but plunged to my feet when I slowly pulled open the door.

My entire body froze, filling with ice-cold dread as I watched them kissing. How could he do this to me? On our daughter's birthday. Tears blurred my vision and I sucked in a deep breath, trying not to breakdown.

It was then that I noticed his eyes were wide open, his body unmoving except for the gentle pushing on her shoulders. Her eyes were closed and she gripped his biceps firmly, pulling him to her scantily clad body. _That bitch! I knew it!_

Red filled my vision and I wanted to rip her off of him by her hair. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?" I screamed at them, wanting to tear her to shreds.

Emmett shoved her away finally and quickly looked over to me, his face paling at the sight of me. I knew now he wouldn't willingly do anything with her. "B-babe, it's not what it l-looks like," he stuttered. I glanced at him, my heart melting at the sight of his nervous expression. _Oh, honey..._ However, I stalked towards them, standing in front of Blondie, my eyes scanning her unfortunately gorgeous body with a sneer on my face.

When I looked back up into her eyes, she stumbled back a step, her eyes now wide with panic at my hate filled stare. "You!" I shoved her hard in the middle of her chest, trying to avoid touching her obviously fake breasts, and continued to approach her until she was back up against the wall. "You stay away from my husband," I yelled in her face as Emmett moved away from her to stand behind me.

"I have seen you watching him all day. I've watched you try to flaunt your clearly fake body," waving a hand at her breasts, "at him every time you thought he was looking your way, and I cannot _believe_ that you had the guts to do that in front of me," my expression turned dark as I glared at her longer. "I am his _wife_! If you think that you can just waltz in here one day, at _our_ daughter's birthday no less, and make a move on him, think again."

She tilted her chin up and stuck her chest out, causing me to roll my eyes. "_He_ has been watching me all day, too. It doesn't take a genius to see why." She smirked as she looked up and down my sun dress covered body up to the messy bun on the top of my head. As if she was better than me. Emmett growled behind me, fueling my anger further. She was overstepping her boundaries.

"The whole damn party was watching you, you bitch! Including the kids. The only reason I didn't throw you out was because you are Bella's friend. She is like a sister to me and if she trusted you, so did I. She said you were going through a rough time so I figured I'd be nice and let it go. But no! You had to go and pull this shit, throwing our kindness and hospitality back in our faces."

Her expression crumpled for a split second, and I almost felt sorry for her, before she was back to glaring at me. "You haven't been nice to me since I got here. I've seen your glares and your sneers. You even gave me a smaller piece of cake than everyone else!"

I would have laughed at that comment if I wasn't so pissed. "Yeah well, you want to keep your slim figure, don't you?" It was my turn to smirk now.

She scowled at me, causing her face to look uglier. But then her face brightened, as though a brilliant thought popped into her head. "Well, it wouldn't take much to get him away from you. It's all a matter of _timing_." She smiled widely at me, as if that would make me happier.

Now it was my turn to growl as I drew back my fist and snapped it forward, hitting her right on her fake nose and knocking her to the ground. She screamed out as a gratifying crack echoed around the pool house. I drew back my fist to punch her again. Before I could throw it forward, Emmett's strong arms came around my waist and dragged me backwards, holding me close to him and whispering in my ear, "Babe, calm down. She's just talking shit. I love you and would never leave you for anyone."

His words soothed me slightly. My anger abated as I watched her stand, her chest covered in blood and clutching her nose. I smirked at her again, satisfied that I had at least gotten to hit her once. Tears were streaming down her face as she threw me a dirty look, her eyes snapped quickly behind us, looking scared now.

I turned my head slightly to see everyone standing there, watching us with wide eyes and opened mouths. Bella stepped forward, looking concerned. "Rose? Lauren?"

My gaze went back to the bitch as she began to shake her head back and forth, her eyes darting around to find an exit. I knew the only one was the door in which I entered. "Leave. Now. And don't come back." I leaned slightly forward, Emmett's grip still holding me tight to him. "_Ever._"

She looked me square in the eyes, as if saying she'd be back. "Get out," Emmett's angry voice said behind my head. She stared at him shocked. Clearly, she was expecting him to want her back. Glaring at me one last time, she ran out the back door. I heard the fence gate open and close, and knew she finally left.

My body relaxed in my husband's embrace. The threat was gone. "Mommy?" I turned at the sound of my little girl's voice. She ran up to us, jumping into my arms and snuggling her head into my neck. "Is the mean lady gone?" she whispered. Everyone began to leave the pool house, with Bella, Alice, and Esme giving me looks letting me know I would be explaining later. I turned to face Emmett, a smile on my face.

"Yes, baby. And she's not coming back," he told her, looking lovingly into my eyes. Jocelyn reached out, wanting him to hold her. He took her in his arms and held her against him. She turned her head so I could see her clear, blue eyes and rested her forehead against his neck. His arms came around me, pressing me to him as he cradled our daughter between us. "I love you, Rosie. No one will ever ruin what we have. I promise you."

"Oh, Em. I love you, too," I whispered as I leaned up to place a soft kiss on his lips. He really was the perfect husband and the perfect father to Jocelyn. I shouldn't have doubted him. I knew that our love went deep, unconditional and eternal. We would always belong to each other. No matter what other obstacles came our way, or how many hardships we had to go through, I knew that he would always be mine.

**A/N: **Voting will be 10/7 through 10/11. Winner announced 10/12. Vote at:http://www(DOT)fanfiction(DOT)net/u/2057730/DILF_Contest

CullenBabe86: It has been so much fun writing this and laughing with Hannah over the details of this story. Thanks Simone for all your help with beta'ing! I hope you all enjoy is as much as we have. I've never written a collaboration story before so it was a great experience and I will definitely do one again. Thanks for reading!

Hannah81: I had a great time writing this. I want to thank Kristen for being such a great writing partner and Simone for her wonderful beta'ing skills. I hope you all enjoy it! We thought it was time to give Emmett some love :)


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